2 years. It's been two years. I've never felt so miserable nor that unhappy for such a long period of time. I never give up. I know I won't. People tell me to just move on and that he's not worth whatever I've done nor my tears, so why am I still holding on?

One thing's certain, I will never have the urge to kill myself again I have my family and whiskey, I will live for them. But my heart ache like mad. Why, tell me why, I could give up so many things for him, just him, why hasn't he ever appreciated me at all? Does he know the suffering he put me through when I have to give up my good friends just for him, yet never complain at all? It's okay though, it really is okay. Because that hope of a little bit of cherish kept me going. Perhaps if I did many things for him, he would come to love me even more, he will understand and treasure whatever I've sacrificed for him.


I subjected myself to misery, to sufferings, to tears, through heartaches, through physical pain, hoping that baby, you will come to pay more attention to me and my heart; to see how much pain i'm going through for you, to let me feel that you'll never let me go.
I know you like the back of my hand. Many times when I guessed what your replies would be or how you would react, it was nearly always hit on the nail. But have you understood me like how I know about you? Do you know why sometimes I would do this but didn't mean to, and other stuff that even put you to great heart ache?

Baby I don't need you to shower me with monetary possessions. All I ever need is your attention, that amount of attention that i see couples giving to each other. The time, the trust, the love, the pamper that girls receive from their sweet boyfriends. It aches when I've to put in so much effort to see that smile on your face but you've never come to appreciate me.

A sorry from you was all I ever needed. That's sufficient for me to forgive you. But Baby, please don't go on making the same mistakes, hurting me again and again because I don't have the patience of God.

Where do I stand in your heart? Tell me, show me you will do anything for me like how I will always give in to you. Tell me you care bout me and never wanna see me upset again. Tell me how much you wanna hold my hand tight and never let me go. Tell me you'll never let it go. Tell me, that you love me.